Who is The Movie Mind?
The Movie Mind …
• is a true fan of movies
• watches movies for their entertainment value
• would choose a bad movie over a “good book” any day of the week
• is NOT a movie snob
• thinks the most difficult question to answer is, “What is your favorite movie?”
• will NOT answer that question with “Citizen Kane”
• cannot help but to incessantly quote movies at will
• believes that quoting a good line is funnier than offering an original thought
I am The Movie Mind.
What purpose do movie reviews serve?
They either give a lame representation of a film plot in the shortest space possible (i.e., a nomadic love story which features a coming of age protagonist caught in a rash of self-destructive behavior and fighting inner demons whilst not succumbing to his destiny and ill-fate), or provide a pulpit for some self-proclaimed intellect who couldn’t cut it in film school to prove he or she is smarter then you and me.
Don’t you just love when movie reviewers talk about imagery, and make these so-called “brilliant” references to some vague time in history or to a book you couldn’t pay me to read? In their eyes, that’s what makes a good movie.
The critics want you to go along and become part of their little nerd club. They want you to feel like if you didn’t see what they saw, you are dumb. You are not worthy of watching that movie and you aren’t smart enough to appreciate it if you thought it sucked.
How is The Movie Mind better than them?
Simple. He gives you REAL movie reviews from a REAL movie fan. He will not be afraid to give a warm review to those “guilty pleasure” movies no sane person would admit to watching (but can’t turn off when it’s on).
Plus, he knows a movie can get better or worse each time you watch it. Not only will The Movie Mind give upfront reviews on movies that he finds entertaining, but he’ll update his reviews every time he watches the movie again. It’s easy to blurt out an initial reaction to anything but—just like your mom’s meatloaf—some things take time to grow on you.
Each review will include a section that recommends other movies to see if you enjoyed that particular film, memorable quotes from the movie, and where the film stacks up in The Movie Mind’s All-Time lists.
If you haven’t stopped reading yet—well, frankly, you’re a better man than I—but you might also be asking:
What tastes does The Movie Mind have? How can I know to trust him?
Let me give you a hint: If you respond to the question “What types of movies do you like?” with “Mostly Indie films,” leave this site right now. No, really. Leave now. Go sip your Starbucks Orange Mocha Frappaccino and read the Village Voice while petting your Paris Hilton-like rat-dog somewhere else. That nonsense will not be tolerated here.
The Movie Mind has a number of lesser known, and sometimes “Indie” films in his cache, but by no means does that give him a license to be a tool. There will be reviews of all kinds of films, from sophomoric comedies to chick flicks and, of course, sports films.
The Movie Mind has no desire to waste your time, or bore you to death to make himself feel smart. This doesn’t mean that every piece of garbage thrown onto the screen will receive a favorable review. Too often with movie critics it’s a popularity contest. They feel the need to bash movies everyone loves, and rave on about some 8th grade student film nobody has ever heard of to make themselves feel smart.
What else can you expect from TheMovieMind.com?
In addition to having an undying love to watch movies and make them a constant topic of conversation, I am also a jock. Or I should say, ex-jock. Just like most of you, I watch sports all the time. I listen to sports-talk radio. Some of my hardest decisions come on cold Sunday afternoons, when choosing whether to watch some disastrous football game (i.e., the Houston Texans vs. the Cleveland Browns) or jump into the middle of a Rocky marathon. These are tough decisions!
Have you ever had this argument in a bar: Who are the greatest movie baseball players of all time? Well I have. And I intend to settle it in “The Movie Mind All-Star Baseball Movie Team” List. This and much more are waiting. I have all this useless knowledge to share, and this is my forum to do it.
Some background to The Movie Mind…
A while back, when thinking about what I really wanted to do with my life, approaching a virtual career crisis, I always thought … if only I could make use of all that useless knowledge about movies that occupies most of the rapid-access memory in my head. I mean, if there was only a way to put my ability to drop seamless references from The Cable Guy or Zoolander in mid-conversation to use, I would be set! Hence, The Movie Mind was born.
This is who I am. I am The Movie Mind.